Two people who were very close to me once told me, that you can love someone even if you don’t love yourself. – Is that true? Is that possible?
Well, if I want to give or give something to someone, then it has to be mine first, doesn’t it? – So how can I give something that I do not have myself?
If I want to give someone water to drink, I should at least have some with me. But when I’m dying of thirst myself and only have a sip of water left, there’s no point in giving someone else the water, one of you will definitely die of thirst. It is similar with our relationships. How can I love someone if I have no love for myself? – Would I want to get to know and love myself if I met myself? Or do I insult and condemn myself, devalue myself and accuse myself again and again?
Unfortunately, we often do this, namely when we are dissatisfied with ourselves or when our beloved have “triggered” us by reminding us of a long forgotten situation through an act or statement. For example, a behavior of your mother, who has insulted you and made you small and has forbidden you to speak, has thrown at you that you are lazy or stupid or naughty. If a similar comment, a hint or a certain voice comes from your partner, we immediately feel like we are being taken back as a child and react accordingly hurt, angry or sad. These wounds are often not healed and we look for the love our parents missed in the outside, in our partner. If we don’t take a closer look at these childhood wounds and triggers and heal them, and learn how important it is now to take this into our own hands and give this love to ourselves, your partner can endlessly love you and do everything for you, but it will never be enough – because YOU are not enough and do not love and accept you as you are. And you yourself will have the feeling that it will never be enough!
Where will the healing and love come from that you cannot feel or are not? Because that is you, pure love and came into this world out of love!
Today is Good Friday in English – Goodfriday. This day has always been a special day for me, a good day. Jesus died this Friday more than 2,000 years ago on a full moon night for the people. He sacrificed his life for love and truth. He has not hid with his faith and views, but has confessed to love and faith in himself and in his Father (Jahweh) God, and has thus “paid” for it with his life – for us, as friends who even slandered him on the day of his death. for fear of being convicted as revolutionaries of the “New World” in which not religious leaders or politicians should have power, but in which love and faith in themselves and humanity should be at the forefront. “- Love your neighbor – like yourself ” , this should be the only and new commandment for all. – This is God’s kingdom on earth and requires no religion, no politics, no weapons and wars to defend, because everything could simply work if every person orients himself to love, to compassion and helpfulness, to sharing joy and happiness. and abundance, but also grief or fear, and care for one another instead of just thinking of oneself and accumulating wealth and power. This was Jesus’ teaching, and for that he even died.
What happened after my time out…
After 3 days back at the old workplace, which is supposedly so safe, I realized that this security is difficult and expensive to pay, namely with freedom. I have been reduced to only working on tasks and duties and from obeying instructions that have been forced into one without regard. I felt like an object that you move from A to B, a thing, but not like a person, a person you talk to and take into account his feelings and abilities. If you are only judged by quantity instead of quality, and the customer falls by the wayside, this is no longer the right workplace for me.
This became very clear and so, after a mental breakdown and the additional burden of separation, I decided to find a fair solution, to leave the old company and to go my own way.
Winter is just around the corner and I am already suffering from wanderlust. – now I do not have to ask anyone, submit applications or revise myself in order to save additional time, which I can then reduce with vacation and flexitime. Because this is like 2 months 40 degrees Celsius and 2 months 0 degrees Celsius, are on average pleasant 20 degrees, but still freeze once 2 months and 2 months of extreme sweating. You don’t really have any of it.